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Why shouldn't an older woman TTC?

Catherine McDiarmid-Watt | Tuesday, January 23, 2007 | 0 comments

I have been surfing the fertility boards lately, reading stories of early menopause, high FSH, diseased ovaries, cycles that only come 2-3 times a year, hormones out-of-whack. On and on the stories go, of problems getting, and staying, pregnant. So much difficulties, so much struggle. All ages, all over the world.

But they keep trying, they keep hoping, they keep going to doctors, hoping there is a baby somewhere in the future for them. And I hope, with all my heart, that each one of them comes to know their baby's love!

So why is it so wrong when an older woman, still cycling regularly, still ovulating regularly, still getting pregnant (even if not resulting in a sticky pregnancy yet) with good to average hormone levels, healthy and full of life - is told she must stop trying, must stop hoping, must stop believing? That she is mad to continue, that she must be "missing" something in her life, that she has lost her mind?

Why, just because she is "too old"? Who decided what age was acceptable... and why? How old was your grandmother, your great-grandmother, your great-grandmother when she had her last child? My great-grandmother was 54 years old at the birth of her last child!

I would contend that this older woman is in much better reproductive health than most on those fertility boards. She needs no extensive medical help to get pregnant, she does not drain her family's finances to have a child. If she has a child, no-one will be deprived of their child - there is no limit, no shortage.

If they can be "allowed" to continue trying, shouldn't she? If they can be "allowed" to continue to hope, shouldn't she?

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About Catherine: I am mom to three grown sons, two grandchildren and two rescue dogs. After years of raising my boys as a single mom, I remarried a wonderful man who had never had a child of his own. Unexpectedly, I found myself pregnant at 49!
Sadly we lost that precious baby at 8 weeks, and decided to try again. Five more losses, turned down for donor egg, foster care and adoption due to my age and losses - we have accepted that there will be no more babies in our house.

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